Couples therapy, also referred to as relationship or couples counseling, is a form of psychotherapy designed to help partners in conflict to recognize the challenges that are weighing upon their relationship.
The main difference from other types of therapy is there are usually two individuals involved. Couples can work with a therapist to discuss the problems in their relationship and learn how to interact with each other in order to solve them.
At its core, relationship counseling is meant to help couples by providing both partners with tools in order to communicate with less fear but more compassion and deal with the problems in an ethical manner.
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Seeking relationship counseling
Most people are of the opinion that counseling should only be sought when a divorce or separation is imminent. This is actually too little, too late. In fact, couples who seek premarital counseling later report a significantly higher marriage satisfaction and their divorce rate is reduced by 50%.
Many couples seek therapy even when there are no problems apparent, only to create a solid foundation to their new found relationship and prevent post-marital issues from popping up.
Couples therapy is not just for couples facing extreme problems, as healthy relationships too need some assistance from time to time to navigate through life. According to NPR, instead of going to lawyers to resolve their differences, even some business partners are now seeking couples counseling before things get out of hand.
Is couples therapy good for all?
Not really! While couples counseling has proven to be of great help for many relationships,one has to acknowledge the fact that every relationship cannot be saved.
While many couples may benefit from therapy, its effectiveness depends on various factors such as the willingness of partners to change, the level of commitment and most importantly the skill of the chosen therapist.
It may not work for everyone, especially in a case where one or both the partners are not fully engaged in the process. Some couples may find individual therapy suitable, or may first wish to address other problems like addiction for example, before they can get the full benefit of couples therapy.
Situations arise where it may be healthier for couples to separate rather than stay together. This option should not be viewed as a breakdown, instead it will allow both parties to gain better self-development.In such cases counseling can then help the couples to navigate a healthy separation.
How does couples counseling work?
Just like any other form of therapy, couples therapy is designed to relieve couples in distress and improve their functioning in the sphere of life.
There are three parties involved with the therapist at the helm impartially performing a balancing act as per the needs and interests of all the three persons involved.
Couples therapy is held co-jointly with the presence of both partners as a pre-condition. That said, therapy with one partner is sometimes deemed necessary to gain any vital information important to the relationship, but with the express consent of the other partner.
Between sessions, couples are advised to practice at home the behavior, insights and problem solving skills they have learnt during therapy.
There are, however, some key differences between couples counseling and therapy. Counseling tends to be short term while therapy sessions can last for a much longer period.
Again, counseling focuses more on the present and treats current problems while looking ahead to the future. Therapy explores more of the past so as to make the right adjustment to benefit the present and the future.
Pros of couples therapy
The key benefits of couples therapy depend entirely on the couple seeking help. The more both partners are willing to put into their relationship, the better the end result is likely to be.
Couples counseling offers a number of benefits, including better communication, conflict resolution, increase in sexual and emotional intimacy and an enhanced understanding of what both partners need.
Additionally, couples therapy also teaches partners how to de-escalate an argument, assists in learning how to parent together and see things from your partner’s perspective.
After several counseling sessions, one can gain a new perspective about the world as a whole, while at the same time your partner can gain a better insight of your experiences and thoughts.
Couples therapy works on educating both individuals to be a better partner for the other. If you are not married and you realize you need couples therapy it may help in preventing a bad marriage or a marriage that was never meant to be.
Disadvantages of couples counseling
Couples counseling requires a high degree of both time and commitment. It also requires a level of financial investment as every session has a price tag.
Couples need to commit a lot of time and be regular in attending the sessions and consider factors that can align with their schedule and budget. A good solution for this is online couples therapy which is both cheaper and easier to fit into busy daily lives.
In some scenarios, couples therapy can actually end a marriage. During sessions,couples can uncover what makes each of you tick. This can make the relationship seem very one-sided and motivate either partner to end things
Lastly, there is no way to know beforehand what the end result after the therapy sessions will be,no matter how much each of you may want to help.
Points to ponder
While this kind of therapy is widely used to address issues and can benefit a relationship at any stage,the created misconceptions push people away from the process.
Couples are still reluctant to seek counseling together despite the fact that considerable progress has been made in the acceptance of therapy.
Very few men and women have had exposure to tools that can foster a long-term relationship,hence for those who are struggling it is wise to consider therapy as early as possible since it can only get worse with passage of time and without prompt intervention will likely meet a sad end.
So if you are having relationship issues with your partner, there is no shame in seeking help from a therapist to attempt to resolve the problems and own up openly for your words and actions.
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