In today’s world, raising children who are capable of expressing themselves openly and freely is a challenge. They face a range of distractions from smartphones, video games, and social media influencers. At the same time, children are exposed to far greater stress than in the past. Substance abuse and addictions have become commonplace, and parents often feel at a loss.
They wonder why their kids don’t open up to them about these and other issues. This can be a painful experience for them, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Effective communication is the cornerstone of a strong and healthy relationship between parents and children. Communication becomes even more crucial when bridging the age gaps between early childhood, middle childhood, and teenage years.
In this article, we will understand how to promote healthy communication with your kids through different age groups.
For more on this topic, check out the full Child Behavior collection
Mental Health: Not The Best Everywhere in The Country
Some parts of the country with low levels of mental health can also benefit from parents fostering better communication with their children.
For instance, Texas has been ranked the worst state in the country when it comes to mental health. Many school teachers in the state have noticed how mental wellness has seen a downturn in recent years as well. Jared Braun, a teacher from the Spring Branch ISD in Greater Houston, noted how the pandemic did a number on child mental health.
In an interview with the Texas Standard, Braun spoke about how many children are hesitant to speak up in class or try to make friends.
A lot of parents realize that finding a qualified Texas therapist is tricky. 16.3% of the state is rural, and the state’s awkward stance with Medicaid has made the affordability of therapy through insurance a challenge.
Even then, parents that can afford a therapist may not be able to find the right one. According to Zencare, specialization, qualification, and personal fit are three key factors to look for when selecting a child therapist.
Given how confusing it can be to find support, it is no wonder that many parents remain confused. They end up neglecting important aspects, like learning how to foster healthy communication.
To address this issue, here are some strategies for developing healthy communication in each age group of your child.
1. Early Childhood
At this age, you want to demonstrate and model active listening. Be genuinely interested in what your child has to say. Get down to their eye level, maintain eye contact, and actively listen to their thoughts, stories, and questions.
This conveys that their words are valued and will encourage further communication in the future.
Incorporating play and creativity into communication can be a wonderful strategy. Imaginative play, storytelling, and drawing together foster self-expression and can help young children communicate their thoughts and emotions more effectively.
It gets them used to the feeling of freely expressing emotions instead of keeping them bottled up inside.
Communication is Both Verbal and Non-Verbal
According to Unicef, parents should pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal communication. Our facial expressions and level of eye contact are as important as the words we speak.
When using verbal language, remember to use age-appropriate language. Keep instructions and explanations simple and concrete. Try to break down concepts into understandable terms so that your child grasps the meaning and can respond accordingly.
2. Middle Childhood
At this age, the importance of engaging in mutual hobbies and activities takes on great importance. Your child is starting to explore the world more and more and will benefit from your guidance and proper modeling of appropriate communication.
Set aside some dedicated time with your child. This can include shared meals, walks, hikes, or sports. These consistent interactions create opportunities for deeper conversations and allow for the natural flow of communication.
Avoid Forced Communication
Many parents who wish their child would communicate more go about it in the worst way possible. They try to sit the child down opposite them in an attempt to force a genuine interaction.
Even as adults, we tend to feel most comfortable when communication occurs naturally. We dislike forced communication, and the same is true for children.
Middle childhood is a time of emotional growth and self-discovery. Validate your child’s feelings, even if you may not fully understand them. Let them know that their emotions are valid, and offer support and guidance when needed.
3. Adolescence
A lot of parents find great success communicating with their children during early and middle childhood. However, when the teenage years arrive, it often feels like something goes horribly wrong.
Their once-expressive child, who never hesitated to talk and share, starts to withdraw. The free-flowing openness they displayed in earlier years disappears, and attempts of communication from parents are met with a wall of stony indifference.
Such an abrupt change in behavior when children enter their teen years is extremely common. This is often because teenagers crave independence and autonomy.
As much as it may sting, parents need to respect their need for privacy. Be supportive and avoid judgment when discussing sensitive topics.
Model Appropriate Behavior
The physical and mental maturation of their child is often startling to parents as much as it is to the teen. Teenagers start to feel more confident in their own ideas and thoughts.
They may start disagreeing with their parents, who take it as a sign of rebellion and deliberate acting out.
In such situations, prioritize non-confrontational approaches. Choose the right time and place to have conversations with teenagers. Instead of fighting and arguing back, take a more mature stance and opt for calm and non-judgmental discussions.
This is a great opportunity to model how mature adults behave and communicate. Show empathy, validate their experiences, and try to understand their perspectives. You will be surprised to see that they will eventually incorporate the same attitudes.
Conclusion
Being a parent in 2023 doesn’t have to be scary. It may seem like children are growing up quickly these days, and in a way, they are. It’s a competitive world out there, and as a parent, it’s natural to be worried.
Remember that when it comes to developing healthy communication in your child, the best way is to start early. Make it a priority from early childhood.
As your children grow older, model appropriate communication. Sure, there may be hitches during adolescence, but with patience and respect, you can ensure your relationship remains open, loving, and strong.
For more on this topic, check out the full Child Behavior collection
