What if your son is developing a personality where he keeps to himself? Don’t be alarmed, you might have someone very unique being made right in front of you! While some kids love being in large groups, other children actually prefer to be by themselves – which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Introverted boys have amazing things to offer. And it is always our job as parents to support them in their interests and natural abilities.
But I think we can almost all agree that we would be alarmed if our children chose not to take part in group activities at all. Well, let’s learn to understand what this means before we think of it as a defect. First, your child isn’t abnormal, he is actually quite normal. However, he has a few characteristics that you may need to explore.
For more on this topic, check out the full Child Behavior collection
Where does his mind go?
If he appears to be reading a lot more than the other kids, you should encourage this. However, let’s take a look at why this could be happening. He’s bored with his surroundings? He finds stories to be more exciting than playing with other children? Or perhaps he wants to understand ideas, concepts, characters and their actions as well as motives. What you could have in your son, is an inquisitive mind eager to understand the meaning of these stories. To a greater extent, you might want to understand why he is reading such stories as well as understand the reason why they are important. Children’s stories always have a moral to them. ‘The boy who cried wolf’ is a prime example. Sit down and explain why using alarmist or over-the-top language can cause people to undermine and not believe you. Logically, he is very interested in hearing the explanation.
[Read: Curiosity or Anxiety?]
Understanding Introverted Boys
Every single boy is different, and dads need to be okay if their son is breaking the common mold. How boring would it be, if every child growing up, turned out to be the same? But it’s totally understandable why fathers might want to see signs that indicate their son is growing up to be ‘normal’. If you want to know more about his personality, ask him to take the online Enneagram personality test. Just answer a few simple and complex questions, and you will be given a personality type. If he scores personality type 5, he is a thinker. These types of people like to explore ideas and concepts. If you have a son like this, it might be a great idea to introduce him to a philosophy book or perhaps a science journal.
[Read: 100 Fun Ways to Connect With Your Dad]
Long-term planner
Studies have shown children who are introduced to chess and classical music, tend to be at home thinking about long-term solutions to problems. The intricacies of chess maneuvers and strategies, together with the complex compositions of classical artists, create a mind that is designed to look ahead. If given this type of upbringing, your son could feel right at home in an economics class, or perhaps learning about the classics which explain how civilization itself came to bear.
[Read: New Year New Goals]
Fathers need not worry if their sons are a little reclusive. It’s okay to be different. And if your son is more interested in ideas than people, cater to his needs instead of forcing him to go play with the other children. If you look hard enough, you will find something that the two of you can do together and bond over.
For more on this topic, check out the full Child Behavior collection