Sometimes, raising children is more challenging than it should be. One of the most frustrating issues is sibling fights. Unfortunately, there can be various reasons why your kids are on the warpath with each other. As experts from Survive Divorce suggest, a huge life event such as divorce can set kids by the ears. Nevertheless, the reason for all the fighting might also be something minor, like using another sibling’s toy.
When your children keep fighting with each other, it might be difficult to stop them. After all, they live and sleep under the same roof. Luckily, there are a few options you can use to put an end to sibling fights once and for all. They include setting clear boundaries, setting up routines, teaching your children tolerance, and filling in the role of the mediator. So, if you wish to stop your kids from fighting, you came to the right place. Here is how you can bring more peace into your household.
For more on this topic, check out the full Siblings collection
Set Clear Boundaries
All children need rules and boundaries. They’re not always easy to follow, but they are essential. Let your kids know that fighting is not allowed and set consequences if they cross the line. This way, they will see that you’re serious about their behavior.
If they break the rules you set, don’t be afraid to punish them. However, be sure to give them a consequence that fits the crime. It could be as simple as taking away their video game playing privileges for a few hours. Or something big like losing their cell phones for a day. Whatever you decide, make sure it fits the crime.
It’s also essential to remain consistent. If one child is punished for something and another isn’t, it can cause issues. Make sure you treat each child the same way when it comes to consequences.
[Read: Establish Boundaries and Give Siblings Their Own Space]
Set Up Routines
Routines are an excellent way to put an end to sibling problems. Both of your children can rely on routine to get them through the day. When you have a routine, your children will feel more prepared for the events in their day. It will also prevent some of the frustration they might experience while waiting for something to happen.
You should also make sure that your kids understand what kind of behavior is not tolerated during mealtime. For example, they should know that you want them to talk quietly and finish their food before leaving the table. If they follow your rules, be sure to tell them how proud you are of them.
Teach Your Children Tolerance
If you want to stop sibling fights in your household, you should teach your children tolerance. This way, they will learn how to deal with other people’s differences and take things in stride.
For instance, if one of your children wants to play with something that doesn’t belong to them, explain that they don’t have control over another person’s property. Teach them that they shouldn’t take what isn’t theirs or try to force someone into doing something they don’t want to do. This way, they will always know how to deal with different situations without causing a problem.
Become The Mediator
In many families, parents step in and mediate sibling fights. Thanks to this method, they can help children figure out a solution together. However, it is crucial that you remain the mediator and not step in yourself.
Instead of telling your children what they should do, ask them what they think is best. After all, you want them to learn how to resolve their conflicts on their own. If you help them resolve their issues by fixing them for them, you won’t help them grow as much as you would if they worked it out themselves with your support.
[Read: How to Set Expectations for Your Kids and Improve Child Behavior]
Listen to Each Side
When your children fight, it is crucial to listen to each of their sides. Similarly to the situation when you disagree with someone, it is vital to listen to both sides and allow each person to voice their opinion.
The reason for this is simple: no person likes to be interrupted. If you don’t listen to both sides, your children will feel frustrated, which will lead to more fights in the future.
One of the best things you can do is to let one child talk for a while before you allow the other child to share their views as well. When you do this, you show them that both opinions are valid and that they need to work together to reach a solution.
Find Out Why They Fight
After listening to your children’s stories, try to find out what caused the fight in the first place. Sometimes, sibling fights are caused by miscommunication or some misunderstanding. Try to get to the bottom of the case and ensure your kids learned to communicate with each other.
Stop Sibling Fights
Sibling fights can be a severe problem. If you let them go on, you might end up with two children who will fight with each other for years to come.
The best thing you can do is listen to both sides, find out why they fight and set clear boundaries. You should also play the role of the mediator and not be the judge. Let your children take the initiative, guiding them towards a satisfying solution. If you do this, your kids will stop fighting sooner than you might think.
For more on this topic, check out the full Siblings collection