What Messages Are We Sending About Kids and Money?

Children need to learn at a young age how to have a healthy understanding and appreciation for money. What messages are we sending our kids about our own relationship with money? Will our children’s observations help them develop a healthy, well-balanced, respect for money? Or is “money” a bad word that is only whispered in front of the children? How is our relationship with money affecting our children, and why does it matter?

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This article is written by Amy Collins, M.S Ed.
For more on this topic, check out the full Saving Money collection

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Kids and Money

As much as we may not want to admit it, having a healthy relationship with money is important to us, and it will be just as important for our children. Their observations of us will undoubtedly affect how they earn, spend, save, and donate money when they are older. It may even affect the career they pursue, the friends they hang out with, and where they ultimately live. We need to be aware of what we’re teaching them, and how our own actions influence them.

First, let’s consider – How did your parents relate to money? How did their handling of money define your own relationship with it?  What common phrases did they use regarding money; are they similar to the ones you use with your own children? Did you inherit that relationship? If so, does it work with you in your current life?

 

Money Talk from our Childhood

Did you hear phases like, “money doesn’t grow on trees.” or “money is a means to an end”? So many of us were also guided by the famous line from Benjamin Franklin’s Poor Richard’s Almanack,  “A penny saved is a penny earned.” My husband’s Mom always said, “It doesn’t matter what you make; it’s what you do with what you make.” That statement spoke volumes and has made a lasting impression on him.

Take a moment and reflect on what phrases shaped your attitude towards money when you were a child, and if that same attitude remains with you today? Is it helpful? What phrases are your children learning from you? “Money” shouldn’t be a bad word, rather it ought to generate the same emotional reaction as the word “fire”: it should instill a sense of respect, healthy appreciation and the recognition that it is a necessity.

 

Money Questions

Some other questions you might want to ask yourself:

• Are your children learning that money needs to be earned and not handed-out freely? Money and work ethic are inextricably linked.

• Is money a cause of stress or arguments in your life? If so, remember our children pick up on everything.

• Do your children understand the distinction between “needs” vs “wants”? Learning this difference at a young age is a valuable lesson.

 

Once we recognize how we were influenced by money growing up, then we can better determine if that attitude was beneficial for us, or if we need to develop a new one? What is most important is that we have a healthy relationship with money that works well for us throughout our life.

After considering this reflection, think about how your children are interpreting your daily messages and actions about money. What are you saying and doing that is and will continue to influence them regarding how they earn, spend, save, and donate their own money someday. The most effective way we can teach them is to live by example.

 

 

 

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